Valentines Gay, NOT
Just based on the advertisements we basically know the entire story about the upcoming celebritypalooza known as Valentines Day the movie (possible big spoilers ahead if you fast forward through commercials or if you're one of those douchebags who says "I don't watch TV" but if that's the case you deserve what you get): Ashton Kutcher proposes to his girlfriend, Jessica Alba, who freaks out and checks into a hotel with her dog. Jessica Biel and Jennifer Garner hold a disastrous Valentines Day party that no one attends before going out to get drunk with girlfriends. Topher Grace hooks up with Anne Hathaway on Valentines Day. And finally Julia Roberts meets Bradley Cooper on an airplane and the two fall in love....or so the ads would have you believe. The real story between those two is far darker and insidious. A fact so horrifying that no audience could handle it. A truth which should the mere word be uttered families would dissolve and children would be in danger of turning into heroin addicts! That fact? Bradley Cooper's character is a homosexual! A closeted homosexual to be exact, and his partner is played by McSteamy himself, Eric Dane, who is conspicuously absent from the posters and all of the television spots I have seen. Which have been plenty. This lie of ommission could possibly be excused if not for the fact that the Cooper/Dane romance is a major plot point of the interwoven storyline. It's not unusual for a production company to attempt to de-gay a movie by leaving all aspects of homosexuality out of the adverts (take for example the controversy surrounding the initial trailers for i love you phillip morris which never mentioned the love affair between the two main characters, which is essentially the crux of the film). I find this practice generally deplorable, especially in a movie which is all about love in it's many forms, shapes, sizes and even Queen Latifahs. This marketing plot to appeal to people who don't like things "shoved in their face" paired with the fact that all of the minorities in the cast seem to be secondary characters is quickly turning me off to a movie that I once had very high hopes for.
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